Sunday, September 19, 2010

been a long time coming ...

life has been crazy.
crazy in all aspects.

new house. new internship.
new exciting chapters.
new perspectives on life and love.

crazy can be CRAZY
but it can also be an insanely great thing.

if life were mundane, would we grow as individuals?
would we appreciate love and kindness if we never experienced heartache and pain first?

so I am learning to embrace my trials and tribulations.
i will stop calling them obstacles but rather opportunities to learn something about myself.
although it is unreasonable to believe i will always be able to smile when the goings get tough ...
i will no longer wallow in a pity pool and allow grief to sway or consume me.

i won't allow myself to believe the hype.
i will just allow myself to love and accept me.

i've made mistakes.
i haven't lived up everyone's expectations or standards.
yes, i have room to grow.
but i refuse to punish myself for not growing fast enough.
i am who i am.
i am learning to love me for me.

i truly believe that once i love myself,
trust my heart,
speak my truths ...
everything else will fall into place.
just like it was meant to be.

my mindset is changing.
i used to think, "hey, if i only did this, this, and that ... things would have been better."
"if only i were skinnier, prettier, smarter ... they would be happy."
but no, i don't have the power to control someone's happiness.
that is their journey
and i am only in control of mine.




sending out much love ...
everyone in the world deserves to know that they are loved, appreciated, and supported!